Floyd "Money" Mayweather Loves the Sound of His Own Voice [SATIRE]

Iliana Chacon/Fusion

I was recently given the chance to interview two top boxers, Floyd "Money" Mayweather and Saul "Canelo" Alvarez.

Now, my knowledge of combat sports is limited to supporting my cousins, mix martial artists, Marcos and David Avellan-- and that really just means going "WOOO TEAM AVELLAN!" on Twitter. So, I decided to approach this as a learning experience and be a good sport (pun intended).

While my fellow guero, Canelo Alvarez, is also a good sport, Floyd Mayweather prefers to think he knows everything (following his reputation.) However, what Mr. Money doesn't know is that I am part bruja, stemming from a long line of brujas before me. I can cast a mal ojo quicker than he can drop 500K at a strip club.

So, Mayweather better watch out! He may doubt my skills as an interviewer but the curse of the Mi'ja is upon him. Viva la raza!

Elise Roedenbeck is a writer and comedian who frequently smells nice and showers often.

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