everybody wins

CNN calls NY bombings ‘wins’ for both Trump and Clinton, because LOL nothing matters

Screen shot

Most people thought the bombings that hit the New York area last week were pretty bad for everyone. Not CNN!

When trying to break down which candidate had the better week on Friday (which, why even bother to begin with?) CNN made some interesting choices in deciding how the bombings affected the chances of GOP nominee Donald Trump. CNN’s verdict? They were great for him! And for some reason, CNN decided that this was less an “amoral dissection of politics in a way sure to disgust all viewers” and more “a cool fun graphic to share with the world.”

Unless you’re a terrorist organization, it’s usually not great to be seen benefitting from a terrorist attack. Even if it “fits your narrative,” having it listed as a win still feels gross (and unless you’re Willy Wonka, a “Skittles controversy” is always a loss).

But don’t worry, Trump supporters, a complementary graphic for Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton showed the political side of this very scary terrorist attack was a win-win. It’s fair and balanced!

Apparently, all it takes for any kind of public event to be considered a “win” for a campaign is to have it “Fit Campaign Narrative.” Which is great, since that means both candidates can win every single political issue for the next few months, as long as they adjust their narrative to campaign events. But unless someone adjusts their narrative to account for a loss, there will be no more win-wins come Election Day.

CNN’s coverage of the 2016 presidential election: where everything’s made up and the points don’t matter!